Posted tagged ‘grouchy’

“It was one of those March days when the sun shines hot and the wind blows cold: when it is summer in the light, and winter in the shade.”

February 23, 2016

My sunny disposition has deserted me. It is an ugly, cold, damp, grey day. Gracie woke me up early when she barked at some outside noises. The house was still cold, and I was still tired, but I dragged myself out of bed and went downstairs and opened the door to check. If I had been a throwaway character in a horror movie, the slasher would have been outside the door just waiting for me. If I were watching the movie, I’ll think how stupid not to check before opening the door and I’d think the character got what she deserved. Luckily no one was there, but my newspapers were on the front step so someone had been there.  It must have been my neighbor. I doubt the slasher would have been so thoughtful.

My dance card is total empty so I am going to hang around the house all day. I doubt I’ll even get dressed. I’ll probably nap as it’s the sort of day which invites getting warm and cozy in bed under the covers. I’ll bring my book.

March is when I am tired of winter. The first day of spring is in March. We turn our clocks ahead the second Sunday in March. Easter is at the end of March. Spring training is over. It’s time to put away the shovels and the heavy coats. I want to see the bright yellow of the forsythias. I want to sit on the deck and be warmed by the sun. I wish the coming of March was the signal that winter has finally packed its bags and moved south, but Mother Nature guarantees nothing.

I thumbed through a couple of travel magazines and salivated over the pictures. It was like I was a kid again reading my geography book and dreaming. My Barrett Syndrome has surfaced. I hope I can hang on until the trip back to Ghana in the fall.

“This is how you do it: you sit down at the keyboard and you put one word after another until its done. It’s that easy, and that hard.”

October 4, 2015

I am in a funk. I have been struck by malaise. Maybe it’s the rain’s fault. It does get old after 4 or 5 days. Maybe it’s my back which has been hurting and making me grumpy. My plans for the day were to stay home, not get dressed and lie in bed and read. Now I have to go out to get cat food. The only 2 cans left are back-ups, food I bought for them to taste which they hated and left untouched in the dish. Rather than toss the cans, I kept them as an emergency supply hoping hunger would overcome distaste. It didn’t happen so I have to get dressed and go to Agway. I thought I’d take a break today and not write Coffee, but then I got started and just kept going. I guess I need a place where I can whine and complain a bit.

The sun was out this morning for about ten minutes. I got hopeful. Foolish me! The gray, damp day has returned. I suspect we’ll have rain later. I had to run the heat again for one cycle this morning. With the cold, I have to keep the back door shut which complicates Gracie going in and out. I figure I’ll put the storm door in today. That’s a surrender of sorts.

Right now Gracie’s deep breathing, her occasional snores and the tap of the keys are all I can hear. The house is almost eerily quiet.

I have the habit of reading what I write out loud. I have to hear the words. My ears tell me more about the language than my eyes. I make corrections based on the sounds of the connected words and on the choices of words. Sometimes it takes me a while to correct a single sentence until it sounds right. I am now at the read aloud stage. I am done writing.

“I dont hate it he thought, panting in the cold air, the iron New England dark; I dont. I dont! I dont hate it! I dont hate it!”

February 7, 2014

Today I am grouchy and tired having not slept well the last couple of nights. I want someone to cross me so I can take my mood out on an unsuspecting stranger. I mean, really, I’d hate to do it to a friend or Gracie and the cats. Maybe a telemarketer will call.

It’s sunny and the sky is blue, but it’s a ruse. The morning is cold. Luckily there is no breeze or wind to make it feel even colder. I have to go out for an appointment so I’m going to add a bit of fun shopping to make the trip palatable. I’ll stop at odd shops, the ones with antiques and little doo-dads. I’ll go up-cape for a change. I’ll bring my camera and my dog.

Everyone is sick of winter. My cousin, living in New Hampshire, said it was about 5 below when she got to work this morning. Compared to her, I live in the tropics. For my sister in Colorado it was 4˚ yesterday though today is supposed to be hot at 40˚. I think it’s the snow causing all these winter woes. It chills the air making it even colder, and without it, we might be able to dupe ourselves into thinking warmer thoughts: I’m lying on the lounge chair on the deck with my face toward the sun. My eyes are closed. The sun is hot so I cool off a bit by taking sips of my drink, the one with the little umbrella. Astrud Gilberto and Brazilian salsa is playing in the background. Okay, I can’t keep doing this.

One look out the window to the snow-covered yard, and I am back in the throes of winter: to the furnace blasting to heat the house, to drinking hot coffee to warm my innards and my cold hands and to wearing flannel pants, a hooded sweatshirt and socks and slippers around the house every day. It’s no wonder I’m grouchy! Even Pollyanna would be having a tough time about now.