Posted tagged ‘cabinets’

“What terrified me will terrify others; and I need only describe the spectre which had haunted my midnight pillow.”

March 13, 2012

I am possessed. There is no other way to describe it. I think it is by some old lady who spent her life cleaning homes or buildings. I have proof. Yesterday I attacked and cleaned one of my biggest cabinets. I was tired of stuff falling out every time I was looking for something so I took everything out. In the way back of the cabinet I found all of the chewed pieces of paper from when the mouse lived there. That was disgusting. I also found half-filled bottles of the same thing so I poured and managed to throw away the empty duplicates. I found stuff I didn’t even know I had. Who needs three aluminum foil boxes? Obviously I do. How about two unopened boxes of Cling Wrap? Last week my nephew wanted 3 in 1 oil which I knew I had but he couldn’t find. Well, I have three of those. I also found lemon oil which is on my shopping list. That led to the next chore.

I oiled the old desk in my bathroom. You probably wonder why a desk is in my bathroom. Well, it is a small narrow, pull down front desk, and I keep my guests linen there. That bathroom has a school theme. No, it is not a reflection on my education!

Next, I mineraled oiled the butcher block in my kitchen then I noticed my dining room table. It has a stain but no finish so out came the lemon oil and I oiled the table and a small stool.

I want the haunting to stop and I want the old lady gone. It is not me to tackle such obscure tasks. The most I usually do is use my sleeve to dust and I’m quite happy with that accomplishment; however, I can hear another couple of cabinets calling me, and I’m forcing myself to stay away from them. I know the old lady is itching for me to get at them.

All of that work and staying up too late caused me to sleep until eleven; that’s right eleven. It was a put a mirror under her nose to see if she’s breathing sort of morning. The animals stayed right with me.

I do have to go out as I have a short list of things I need. What is going on? Here I am cleaning and now grocery shopping. I need an exorcist.

“We Are Borg. We Will Assimilate You. Resistance Is Futile!”

April 29, 2010

The sun is out today, but there’s a breeze so it’s a bit chilly. Warm is coming though. It will be in the 60’s the next few days, may even reach 70. I’m figuring lots of deck time.

Yesterday was a do little day. I did clean out a cabinet and found lots of food older than my dog on the top shelf in the back. I guess I should think of the whole experience as an archeological dig. Maybe I’ll bury it all in the backyard. Years from now anthropologists can try and figure out who Snap, Crackle and Pop were, if all the jars of mustard were part of a ritual, if three was a significant  number for white vinegar and whether or not every family had several jars of pepper jelly.

If Stephen Hawking is to be believed, those messages we’re sending into space are really invitations to come and ravage our planet. I just can’t believe it. Any aliens who tune into The Beatle’s Across the Universe on their space radios would probably be looking for concert tickets, not cities to level to the ground.

If Hawking is right and there are aliens bent on world destruction, maybe they’re here all ready. All we have to do is watch. I saw all the science fiction movies when I was a kid so I know what to look for. They don’t show emotion. Their faces are blank. People who disappear for a bit return with odd robot-like behavior. Their personalities lack any warmth. They don’t drink alcohol, a sure sign of an alien presence. Remind you of anyone? I’m thinking of Sister Redempta.