Posted tagged ‘dead squirrel’

“May you live every day of your life.”

June 16, 2010

The tale of the deceased squirrel has a Monty Python sort of ending. My friend Tony, who is my savior from the dead and dying, arrived with his trusty trowel and some plastic bags in hand. As he was removing the beast, he gave a running commentary. He even offered me an opportunity to check the heft of the bag. I declined. Because the dump was closed, he told me he was taking the squirrel to the park. All I could think of was Monty Python and the dead parrot, and I imagined Tony at the park holding a leash attached to the squirrel. “No no he’s not dead, he’s, he’s restin’!”

It’s a cool, cloudy day, a good day for chores. The bird feeders are empty, the herbs need to be cut and the deck plants need watering. I also have a few errands and Gracie gets to come.

Last night I proposed a Chinese fire drill on our next ride. We laughed at how many light cycles it might take. We figured it best be a deserted road.

When we were kids, life was serendipitous and spontaneous. We never made lists or appointments. That was my mother’s job. It was whatever we felt like doing or whatever we happened to find, like the horses in the pasture or the raft on the pond. I remember trying to catch the horses so we could ride them, and I remember shifting our weight so the raft wouldn’t sink as we poled across the pond. We thought those great finds. We never stayed home. That was for my little sisters. We roamed. We walked or rode our bikes everywhere. Sometimes we brought our lunches with us packed in brown bags. We ate when we were hungry. I remember eating at a picnic table in the zoo and on the back of a train by the tracks.

We’d get home late in the afternoon, filthy and tired. My mother would ask what we’d been up to all day. “Nothing,” was our usual answer.

“We call this a fine mess of squirrels.”

June 15, 2010

The day is beautiful with a bright sun and a cooling breeze. A bit earlier I went out on the deck to enjoy the morning. I stood there for a while taking in the sunshine then I noticed a spawn of Satan lying dead on its back in my yard. Live animals don’t bother me at all but dead ones do. I know it has be be picked up and disposed of, but the whole idea gives me the willies (another good word by the way). My sister wanted to know how the squirrel died. I have no idea and an autopsy is not on my to-do list. Both my sister and I agreed that the removal of dead animals is a guy thing, sexist maybe, but I don’t care. My friend Tony will be over to save me. He told me to cover it with a sheet and suggested a toe tag. He also wanted to know how the squirrel met its maker. I have no idea. I have only viewed the recently deceased from the deck. There will be no services. In lieu of flowers, do nothing.

The events of the morning have intruded on my usual pleasant musings about life long ago; instead, I’m remembering snakes eating chickens in Tamale and the crocodile pond in Paga where, for the price of a chicken, you get to sit on the crocodile who has just dined on said chicken. I used to buy my chickens live from the market, but we never developed a relationship. Food shouldn’t ever have pet names.

All I could think of this morning was how excited Granny Clampett would have been to see dinner delivered.