Archive for the ‘Musings’ category

“I wonder what it would be like to live in a world where it was always June.”

June 1, 2014

Today is a glorious spring day filled with warm sunshine and deep blue skies. I just came back from driving my friends to the bus stop in Barnstable, and the ride home was a joy. The trees along the highway are leafy and are so many different colors of green. Hawks were riding the thermals. No one was in a hurry. When I got off the highway close to home, I saw people walking their dogs, runners along the bike path and bike riders along the road. The warmth of the sun is like a magnet drawing us out of our cool, dark houses. The sun on the deck is waiting for me.

I have memories of Junes long past, of transitions and changes. It was always the month ushering in the freedom of summer days. It was the month of graduations, of moving from one place in my life to another. I left for Ghana in June on a journey which changed my life. I came home two years later in June with experiences to hold for a lifetime. June is when the cape finally wakes from winter, when the flowers all bloom and the air smells fragrant. It is no wonder I count June as my favorite month.

The laundry has made it down to this floor. It is by the cellar door. It may get done today or maybe not. It depends on how long I can stand seeing it lying there. Sometimes I need to do things right away, the laundry obviously not one of those things. This morning it was sweeping the kitchen floor. When I was making the coffee, I noticed dust in the corners and bits of dry dog food around Gracie’s bowl. I lasted only through one cup of coffee then took out the broom. I couldn’t take it any more.

I have decided how to spend my day. I will do nothing but sit in the sun, sip a cold drink and read. The laundry in the hall will just fine for another day or two.

“But I’m really enjoying my retirement. I get to sleep in every day. I do crossword puzzles and eat cake.”

May 31, 2014

The wind is blowing and even the tree trunks are swaying. The sun is more decoration than warmth. The high today will be in the low 60’s and tonight we’ll go down to the 40’s. The house is cold every morning. I still need my sweatshirt. The windows are closed because of the cold and because of the pine pollen. My car is covered in that yellow-green pollen. When it rains, small puddles are ringed with pine pollen while bigger puddles have a slick of pollen not unlike an oil slick, just a different color. The wind blows the pollen in small clouds. I sneeze a lot.

I’m at the stage of my life where sitting around isn’t boring. I don’t have to accomplish anything. I don’t need to be busy. The days go quickly regardless of what I do or don’t do. Some days my bursts of energy have me dusting and polishing. I do a few loads of wash. Gracie and I go to the dump. I buy some groceries. That is my busiest sort of day. It merits an afternoon nap.

When I worked, I got to school at 6:20 and got home around 4 which left little time to do anything but read the mail, have dinner, watch a TV show or two and go to bed early as the alarm rang at 5:00. In winter I was a mole and seldom saw the sunshine except through a window. The weekends were for doing all the chores and errands. I grocery shopped, changed my bed, did laundry, cleaned a room or two and went to the dump on Sunday. If I did anything fun, it was usually Saturday night. Back then I never stopped to think how narrow my life was. I was too busy with every day.

When I was getting ready to retire, I was asked if I had any plans on how to fill my days. I didn’t. It was enough knowing I no longer had to set the alarm and get up at an ungodly hour. I loved being retired from the first day. If I had nothing to do, I was fine with that. Each day was a blank piece of paper ready to be filled or even left blank. This summer it will be ten years since I retired. They have been remarkable years.

Journalism is the ability to meet the challenge of filling space.

May 30, 2014

The sun is simply glorious. The rug by the front door is dappled with sunlight and one of the cats has found the perfect spot and is stretched out for maximum sun exposure. The other cat, Maddie, and the dog are in here with me on the couch. It is their morning nap time. The house is chilly. It was 63˚ when I came downstairs. Given my druthers, I would rather have lolled under the warm covers for a bit longer but Gracie was impatient to go outside so I got up, put on my sweatshirt and followed her downstairs. I let her out and put the coffee on. My day had started in the same way it always does.

I don’t yelp anymore so my back is finally on the mend. I have decided not to fall again. My luck can’t go on forever. Luck? I’m talking broken bones and a commercial of me yelling.”Help, I can’t get up.”

I have been sitting here for the longest time and have deleted several paragraphs which led me nowhere. I can’t seem to get a handle on anything today. Maybe I should nap with Gracie on the couch.

Folding maps is a disappearing skill. GPS now takes us everywhere, but it tends to take us directly. I don’t have a GPS system. I am still a card-carrying member of the meandering travel club. I prefer old, once well-traveled turnpikes. Let me drive through small towns and stop at local places for lunch. I have all the time I need to get from one place to another. If a shop or store catches my eye, my car turns right into the parking lot. My mother and I used to ride around to see what we might find. We stopped at antique shops and once had lunch in an old house turned into a restaurant. I think we ate in the living room. Those were the best rides.

Breaking news is on local TV right now. The Quincy Police have arrested and turned over to federal agents a man related to the marathon bombing probe. The station has shown the same films over and over and described them in the same way. My favorite film is of the front door of the apartment building where a woman in a white coat carrying a blue bag gets to the door, sees the cameras, turns around and goes back downstairs. I’ve seen her do that at least six times. I just saw her do it again. My favorite interview was with a woman living two floors above the suspect. She was asked what she heard, and she gave her story about hearing bangs and seeing the swat team. The reporter then asked how she felt about the suspect living only two floors below her. Please! What did he expect her to say? We’re having a block party later.

“Cursive writing does not mean what I think it does.”

May 29, 2014

The house was cold this morning at 63˚. I wanted to stay cozy and warm under the comforter, but Gracie got up and didn’t come back so I knew she wanted out. I groused, put on my sweatshirt and my slippers, the ones with the holes in the toes, and came downstairs. Gracie went out and I forgave her after my first sip of coffee.

When I was a kid, our back screen door was wooden. It was dark green around the outside edges. My mother constantly yelled at us not to slam the door on our way out. We never did. It just closed that way on its own. She didn’t buy it. “You could hold it and close it,” was her answer,  a typical parent’s answer because no self-respecting kid was ever going to stop, hold the door and gently close it. We certainly never did and the door kept slamming and she kept yelling. I thought of it as a summer ritual.

I always checked the coin holder on every public telephone. Sometimes I’d find a dime, a wealth of money. I also used to pick up glass bottles and turn them in for pennies. Even pennies had value back then. I never hunted for the bottles, but if I saw one, I’d carry it to the store. The shopman would open the huge cash register, the one with the round metal keys and the ching sound, and get my pennies. I liked it when my pocket jingled. It made me feel wealthy.

The first phone I remember had finger holes for the dialing with numbers and letters. You turned the dial all the way until your finger stopped then you let go and the dial returned to the beginning and then you entered the second letter or another number. The dial made a great clicking sound on its return trip. Our phone number started with ST 6, and that was the start of every phone number in town. We had a party line and had to listen to the rings to figure out if the call was ours or Mrs. McGaffigan’s.

My local school district made the paper when it said that cursive writing would remain a part of the curriculum. It seems many schools no longer teach it. When I was a kid, I swear every classroom in America had the alphabet, those cards from A to Z, posted one after the other over the chalk board. Each card held one capital and one small letter in cursive. I always liked Z, both capital and small. X was another favorite which may yet become the most used letter in the alphabet. Sign your X next to the dotted line.

“I’ve just been bitten on the neck by a vampire… mosquito. Does that mean that when the night comes I will rise and be annoying?”

May 27, 2014

Yesterday was a weird weather day. It was cloudy then sunny then rainy then cloudy and rainy again. We ate outside under the umbrella. I could hear the heavy drops over my head and loved the sound. The rain didn’t last long, but the clouds hung around the rest of the evening. Today is really warm and the sun is playing hide and seek: disappearing and then returning. The prediction is for rain and the cloudy skies make me believe it.

The Cape was filled this weekend and the line of cars waiting to leave over the Sagamore Bridge stretched for miles. The paper today was filled with glowing predictions for the summer based on this weekend. I groaned a little, but that’s the price to pay for living here. I knew it going in so any complaints are just from frustration, useless at best.

My world is turning green from pine pollen. My voice is already raspy and I cough. The windows are closed as I’m trying to keep the pollen at bay, but I am Sisyphus with a dust cloth instead of a rock.

I grew up in summer darkness. My mother kept the shades down all day so the house would stay cooler. We didn’t even have a fan to push the night’s hot air around, but most times we kids were so exhausted from playing all day sleep came easily despite the heat.

I have these wonderfully funny memories of being wakened up at night from the bed rocking and finding my father standing on my bed trying to keep his balance as he chased down mosquitos on the ceiling with a newspaper in his hand. My father was a bit obsessive sometimes and flies and mosquitoes were among his nemeses. He wielded the fly swatter with perfection. The fly would be stationary, and my father with swatter in position would sneak up on it, swat it and then throw away what was left of the fly. Sometimes he’d have to clean the ceiling or the lampshade or worst of all, the kitchen counter. He kept count of his triumphs, “Got it,” was his summer refrain.

” On thy grave the rain shall fall from the eyes of a mighty nation!”

May 26, 2014

This is my annual Memorial Day tribute. I hope you remember those to whom we owe so much.

Memorial Day, originally called Decoration Day, is a day of remembrance for those who have died in our nation’s service. There are many stories as to its actual beginnings, with over two dozen cities and towns laying claim to being the birthplace of Memorial Day. There is also evidence that organized women’s groups in the South were decorating graves before the end of the Civil War: a hymn published in 1867, “Kneel Where Our Loves are Sleeping” by Nella L. Sweet carried the dedication “To The Ladies of the South who are Decorating the Graves of the Confederate Dead.”  While Waterloo N.Y. was officially declared the birthplace of Memorial Day by President Lyndon Johnson in May 1966, it’s difficult to prove conclusively the origins of the day. It is more likely that it had many separate beginnings; each of those towns and every planned or spontaneous gathering of people to honor the war dead in the 1860′s tapped into the general human need to honor our dead, each contributed honorably to the growing movement that culminated in Gen Logan giving his official proclamation in 1868. It is not important who was the very first, what is important is that Memorial Day was established. Memorial Day is not about division. It is about reconciliation; it is about coming together to honor those who gave their all.

Memorial Day

“Dulce et decorum est”

The bugle echoes shrill and sweet,
But not of war it sings to-day.
The road is rhythmic with the feet
Of men-at-arms who come to pray.

The roses blossom white and red
On tombs where weary soldiers lie;
Flags wave above the honored dead
And martial music cleaves the sky.

Above their wreath-strewn graves we kneel,
They kept the faith and fought the fight.
Through flying lead and crimson steel
They plunged for Freedom and the Right.

May we, their grateful children, learn
Their strength, who lie beneath this sod,
Who went through fire and death to earn
At last the accolade of God.

In shining rank on rank arrayed
They march, the legions of the Lord;
He is their Captain unafraid,
The Prince of Peace . . . Who brought a sword.

Joyce Kilmer

“We can’t all be heroes because somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by.”

May 25, 2014

Yesterday was a delight. It was so lovely a day that, despite the tourists, I ventured out to do an errand or two. First was the hardware store for a new American flag, pole and holder. I found one and will put it up today. Next I checked a small antique shop where I am sometimes lucky in finding odd, small, neat and inexpensive stuff. Yesterday I wasn’t lucky. I stopped to get gas then I took a roundabout ride to Dennisport partly for the joy of the ride and partly to avoid the traffic. When I got to Dennisport, I was shocked. Usually I can just pick a parking spot as there are few cars, but yesterday I had to ride around twice before a car pulled out right in front of where I was headed. I smartly paralleled parked and went to get my sandwich and pastry.

Today is cloudy and chilly but the sun is trying to break through to bring a little light. The oak leaves are being tossed by the wind. The day is pretty quiet. I don’t hear any neighbors. I guess today is an inside day.

All the villages are having parades tomorrow. I love Memorial Day parades. They are the same in every small town in America. They were exactly the same when I was a little kid. The police cars with lights blinking start the parade and the fire engines ringing their bells end it. In between are color guards, the veterans from various wars, school bands, the brownies and girl and boy scouts. My town always has a WWII jeep, the same one each year, carrying a veteran too old to walk. The parade takes maybe fifteen minutes to pass by. The small crowd is enthusiastic and claps for everyone especially the veterans.

I remember marching in my first Memorial Day parade. I was a brownie and my whole troop marched. I was probably around seven and I took the event quite seriously. I was proud of being a part of that parade. My parents clapped when I walked by them. That was a highlight for me. When I got home, I was bubbly and so very happy as I relayed the whole story of the parade from the beginning to the end, from one street to the other. I proudly told my parents that everyone was out of step but me.

“As they say on my own Cape Cod, a rising tide lifts all the boats”

May 24, 2014

It is really late, I know, but I slept in. It was a mirror under the nose to make sure I was still alive type morning. It was nearly eleven before I got out of bed. Excuses? I need none. I do have a few things I could do but nothing of any importance, and I am a bit afraid to go out as the traffic to get on the cape was backed up for miles so the roads will be heavy with cars. I’m going to practice all my traffic curses to get ready for the season.

When I was a kid, we never came to the cape. We went to local beaches in Gloucester or we went north to Maine or New Hampshire. I was in high school before I first came down here, and it wasn’t with the family. It was with the drill team to march in a parade in Hyannis. We parked on a side street at the northern end of Hyannis. It was right across from what would become my father’s office in a couple of years. I noticed it was the Hood plant, but it didn’t make a big impression. Had I been a soothsayer, I’d know that plant meant moving and leaving all the friends with whom I was spending the day. After we marched, we spent the rest of the day at a beach. I think it was Scusset Beach right on the canal. It was a fun day.

When I first moved down here, I hated it. It was my first time in a public school, I didn’t know a soul and the guidance counselor had persuaded me to take Latin 4. Even though I had spent all of my school years in a Catholic school my parents made me go to CCD at the church which happened to be across the street. My brother also had to go. The class met in the kitchen of the church hall as all the other spaces were taken. We convinced the priest teaching the class that my brother and I were twins so he’d only have to suffer through one year of CCD. It was an unruly group and the poor priest was at wits end. Eventually we took pity and quieted down. I have no idea what we learned, if anything.

My parents decided that my brother and I didn’t really like them all that much. When we first moved down here, I went to visit my friends at home at least one weekend a month and more if I could scrounge up the money, but over time I made friends and came to love the cape. When I was in the Peace Corps, my parents moved off cape back to the town where I’d grown up. They thought I’d probably join them, but when I finished my years in Ghana, I came home to Cape Cod.

“Scouting rises within you and inspires you to put forth your best.”

May 23, 2014

The house is far chillier than outside so I felt a bit silly wearing a sweatshirt in the morning warmth when I went to get the papers, but my house was only 65˚.

In the second grade I became a brownie. Lots of my friends became brownies too and we could wear our brownie uniforms to school instead of our regular uniforms if we had a troop meeting. I had the regular brownie dress and beanie, but I also had a brown purse which attached to the belt and had the brownie symbol on it. It had been a stocking stuffer one Christmas. I was proud to be a brownie but was thrilled on fly up day, the day I became a girl scout. We had prepared by learning scout songs, the pledge and everything girl scout. Our parents were invited to the ceremony. There were candles on the table and pins in rows. Candles always seem to make any ceremony a rite like in church. I remember our brownie leader made a speech and each of us was called in turn to the front where the girl scout pin was placed on our collars. After we all had received them, we stood as a group and said the girl scout pledge as scouts for the first time. Now our uniforms were green.

Jordan Marsh had a section where you could buy boy and girl scout clothes and paraphernalia. My mother and I went, and we bought my sash and my girl scout green tam. On the sash went the name of my town and our troop number as well as all the badges we earned. The Girl Scout Handbook listed what we had to do to earn those badges. I earned many. It wasn’t difficult.

Lots of us were scouts and most of us earned our ten-year pins. We were always proud to wear our uniforms. I remember wonderful overnights at the scout lodge in my town. It had a huge fireplace, and we slept on wooden cots which weren’t all that easy to put together. We ate hobo stew. We explored the woods on scavenger hunts for certain leaves and plants. We sang taps as the flag was lowered and folded.

I know a couple of scouts. I buy mint cookies from them every year. These scouts do so many different things than we had done, and they have a multitude of choices for uniforms, but they all still have sashes for their badges and they recite the Girl Scout Pledge. It seems we are connected.

“May is a pious fraud of the almanac.”

May 22, 2014

Today has me smiling. No, it is not from the weather as it is cloudy and chilly. Nope, today feels like spring has a hold and summer is pushing. My irrigation guy came today and turned on the lawn irrigation system and the outside shower. Yesterday the front garden was mulched and looks beautiful. All the lilacs have bloomed and some white and purple flowers have also bloomed. I don’t know what they are but they are delicate flowers which seem to bow their heads to the sun. The lilies of the valley have flowered and have spread along the rough side of my driveway and into my backyard. They originally came from my mother’s house so every spring I am thankful for their arrival. I need to buy flower pots, my herbs and veggies, but I’ll wait until next week, until after the hubbub of the long weekend. Lots to do every spring.

Yesterday was a busy day. I bought food for man and beast: for one woman, two cats, a dog and birds. I also bought a new spawn buster feeder. My big spawn buster is missing a critical part, the round, green closer which also acts as a perch. I have checked the entire yard and didn’t find it. I suspect the red spawn stole it and has hidden it. I called the company this morning, and they are sending one right along, no charge. Later today I’ll fill the remaining feeders and put out the new one. I miss my birds.

The flamingo and gnome are still here in their winter quarters. They will be brought out when the deck is summer ready. I’ll play some music and we’ll have a small parade befitting the occasion. I’ll deck the flamingo in her Hawaiian outfit. It will be perfect. The gnome is wearing blue.

We always got out of school for the summer early in June, earlier than the public schools. I think the nuns were ready to get rid of us. The last day was always a half day. The days before it were for final tests and cleaning. We were a free workforce, and I remember we emptied our desks and washed them inside and out. The blackboard got washed. Bulletin boards were stripped and left empty. By the last day, nothing much was left to do. We got our report cards, and we were all promoted to the next grade. When that final bell went off, chaos ensued. There were no more lines of students walking two by two. The nuns stayed put in the rooms. No way were they going to take their chances with the screaming hoard of students running out the door and down the streets.