Posted tagged ‘handkerchiefs with lace edges’

“Varicose veins are the result of an improper selection of grandparents.”

February 2, 2016

Gobbler’s Knob was the place to be this morning when Punxsutawney Phil emerged and didn’t see his shadow. Start packing away those heavy coats, hats and mittens. Spring will be early this year.

Coffee is late for a lot of reasons: I slept late, mirror under the nose late, took my time with the papers and drank my usual two cups of coffee. My calendar is empty for the week so I figure I can dawdle the days away. I’m very good at dawdling.

I live alone with two cats and a dog. When I was a kid, I’d have been labeled the old lady who lives with cats. I’d be wearing house dresses and ratty sweaters, white socks and slippers bent down in the back, and I’d be driving a really old blue or gray sedan under the speed limit, always under the speed limit. The doors in my house would be locked and never opened even in the summer. I’d fix dinner, eat at the table and hand wash my dishes.

My grandmother would have been the poster child for old ladies. She just didn’t have cats, didn’t like any animals. Never in her life did she wear a pair of pants. Her tie shoes were always black. She carried a huge, square faux leather pocketbook, and when she visited, she always kept it right by her side as if we were a house of thieves. She never used kleenex, only handkerchiefs with lace edges. I never saw a dirty dish in her house or a clump of dust in a corner. She was a horrible cook, but we never ate there often. I always thought she didn’t like us all that much.

She lived in a senior housing apartment. My father was a good son who visited her on Saturdays. If I were at my parents for the weekend, he’d try to drag me with him. Once in a while, out of pity, I’d go. My grandmother talked and talked. Sometimes she’d tell us the same thing she had just mentioned a little bit earlier. I’d listen and smile as if I hadn’t heard the story before. My aunt once took her to dinner at a Japanese restaurant where the food is cut and cooked right in front of you. I heard that story at least five times. I smiled every time. I also gritted my teeth.

P.S. We have a new citizen!!