Mother Nature is using clickbait. When I look out the window, I see another lovely sunlit day with a cloudless blue sky. When I go outside, I wish I was wearing layers. It is 27°. Tonight will be between 15° and 20°, and tomorrow will be the same.

When I cut onions, I always cry. Why is it that no TV cook ever cries? What am I missing? I actually bought an onion mask. It didn’t work. I cried in the mask. I then decided to look up solutions. If I cut onions with a strong fan facing me, I’d be cry-less. Also, I could cut them under running water. That, though, seems a bit dangerous at least for me. The best solution was to submerge the onions in a bowl of water to cut them. That’s the one I’ll try.

Last night, while talking to my friend, she asked me how I was doing. I told her I was bland. She laughed, but it is the perfect word to describe me right now. I think February did it to me. 

When I was a kid, I always went to Sunday mass. Sometimes I went with my father, the usher, to an early mass. He ushered at the 8 o’clock. Other times, I’d walk to a later mass. My church had an upstairs and a downstairs. The upstairs was the main church. I preferred the downstairs. The mass was quicker there with no sermon. I was into obligation, not reverence.

My father always carried a white handkerchief. My mother used to iron them. He’d carry one in the back pocket of his suit pants. He was a loud blower, especially in the mornings. I used to think it was gross to use a handkerchief. My father always said it was stronger than Kleenex. 

My socks have holes. That used to drive my mother crazy. When I was a kid, she’d toss the holey socks away. I keep them. No one sees the holes. Mostly, one big toe breaks through. The socks also wear at the heels. I turn the holey part under my toe when I put my shoes on. I walk on the lump. I do buy new socks but I wait for more holes.

My father was a great believer in the magical properties of Vicks. He had a Vicks sweatshirt, one he’d wear every time he lathered himself. My parents’ living room always smelled of Vicks during the winter. When I visited, if I even sniffled, he’d tell me to use the Vicks. I didn’t. It was that smell.

Today will be a quiet day. I have a long to do list, but it will wait. I’m ordering a grocery delivery. I’ll water my plants and put the trash in the trunk for later in the week. My sloth is clapping my inactivity.