Today is Mother’s Day. It is the day I honor my mother and my memories of her. I put my heart into this posting so every year I post basically this same entry with only a few little changes.

My mother was amazing. She was generous, fun to be with and was the perfect martyr when she needed to be, a skill I think most mothers have. It was her tone of voice so filled with pain that caused our guilt to well to the surface. “I’ll do it myself,” she’d say. We’d scurry to do whatever she wanted.

My sisters and I laugh often about the curses she inflicted on us: the love of everything Christmas and never thinking you have enough presents for everyone, giving Easter baskets overflowing with candy and fun toys and surprising people with a gift just because.

My mother had a generosity of spirit. She was funny and smart and the belle of every ball. She always had music going in the kitchen as she worked so she could sing along. She played Frank and Tony and Johnny and from her I learned the old songs. My mother drew all the relatives to her, and her house was filled. My cousins visited often. She was their favorite aunty. My mother loved to play Big Boggle, and we’d sit for hours at the kitchen table and play so many games we’d lose track of the time. Christmas was always amazing, and she passed this love to all of us. We traveled together, she and I, and my mother was game for anything. I remember Italy and my mother and me after dinner at the hotel bar where she’d enjoy her cognac. She never had it any other time, but we’re on vacation she said and anything goes. I talked to her just about every day, as did my sisters. I loved it when she came to visit. We’d shop, have dinner out then play games at night. I always waited on her when she was here. I figured it was the least I could do.

My mother loved extreme weather shows, TV judges and crime. She never missed Judge Judy. She also liked quiz shows and she and I used to play Jeopardy together on the phone at night. She always had a crossword puzzle book with a pen inside on the table beside her chair, and I used to try to fill in some of the blanks. On the dining room table was often a jigsaw puzzle, and we all stopped to add pieces on the way to the kitchen. My mother loved a good time.

She did get feisty, and I remember flying slippers aimed at my head when I was a kid and one time a dictionary, a big dictionary was thrown which luckily missed though the binding broke. I pointed that out to her and that made her madder. She expertly used mother’s guilt on us, her poor victims. We sometimes drove her crazy, and she let us know, none too quietly. We never argued over politics. She kept her opinions close. We sometimes argued over other things, but the arguments never lasted long.

Even after all this time, I still think to reach for the phone to call my mother when I see something interesting or have a question I know only she can answer, but then in a split second I remember. When I woke up this morning, my first thought was of her, and how much she is missed. No one ever told me how hard it would be.

Last night it rained, just as predicted, and the rain has left the morning cloudy, chilly and damp. It will be in the 50’s. I have no to-do list. I could have a list but I don’t choose to make one. The sloth is strong in this one!

The morning is a bit noisy. The birds are vocalizing their complaints. Feeders need to be filled. I watched the male goldfinches strutting their stuff. They are the brightest yellow. Yesterday I heard gobbles but didn’t see the turkeys. I figured they were down by the tiny pond at the end of my street. They roost on the branches there at night. A while later Henry was barking. I checked. The turkeys were across the street still gobbling.

I never saw much wildlife when I was a kid. I saw and heard birds, watched squirrels scurrying across the lawns to climb the trees and once in a while saw a skunk. I love the way skunks sort of waddle when they walk. Once, on a family Sunday ride, we saw deer munching grass in a field. We all screamed for my dad to stop. He did, and we watched a while. We thought it amazing. We had never seen deer outside the zoo before.

In Ghana, during my live-in, when I stayed with a Ghanaian family, I used to visit the wives who lived in a different compound than their husband did. The babies and the toddlers lived there too. I remember vultures were walking around inside the compound. Nobody seemed to mind. I thought it amazing, actual vultures. In the bush one time, I saw baboons. I kept my distance. I watched a snake eat a chicken whole. There was a chicken bump. I stayed far away from snakes, poisonous snakes.

In Mole National Park which I visited on one trip back to Ghana, I saw bush elephants walking by my deck steps on their way to the watering home. I saw gnus, all sorts of monkeys, a variety of deer including antelope, most of which were dining in fields. The ugliest animals were the warthogs.

Here on the cape, there are all sorts of wildlife. Coyotes are common. One used to cross my yard before I put up the fence. Nala will tell you Possums are plentiful. She has caught her share of them. I’ve seen foxes and their kits. I nearly hit a deer which jumped in front of my car. It stared at me and had the proverbial deer in the headlights look. It took me a while to breathe normally. Turkeys are everywhere. Given Nala’s penchant for hunting, I’ve added her to my list of wild animals