“good girls go to heaven and bad girls go everywhere”

Today is so windy that everything is blowing. I hear the chimes, and I can see the tops of the pine tree trunks bending and swaying. I filled the bird feeders earlier and it was chilly, all because of that wind.

It is just one of those days. I couldn’t get into my computer because I kept giving it the wrong password. I didn’t even remember what my hint meant so I had to go through the rigmarole of resetting the password. I walked into the kitchen to get another cup of coffee and ended up on the deck filling bird feeders. I never did get that coffee. I’m thinking I’ll use sticky notes to describe my task and where I’m going. We’re talking in the house, not on the road.

Last night I watched the Oscars. I expected to be bored, but I wasn’t. I actually enjoyed most of it. I had only seen two movies and one of then, Spotlight, won best picture. It was about the Spotlight team of the Boston Globe and its investigation into child sex abuse by Catholic clergy. One of the worst abusers, Father Shanley, was a priest in my parish. He abused some of my classmates so I had a vested interest in the movie.

When I was a kid, I didn’t know anything about sex. I always thought that meant male or female. Fill in one circle. It never occurred to me to wonder how babies started or how they finished. I was seven when my youngest sister was born, and I don’t even think I noticed my mother was pregnant. All of a sudden there was a new baby. I forget when I started to get curious. I think it was my early teens. We were naive in those days. None of us knew much, but we had a lot of questions. When I was in the eighth grade, one of the priests gave us a quick introduction to the basics. He used the chalk board and drew pictures, but that didn’t help much.

In high school, they separated the girls and the boys for a more in-depth introduction to reproduction. They had visual aids. I don’t remember who gave the talk, but I do remember the girl next to be was a nervous wreck. She shook so much that we all shook because we were sitting in linked canvas chairs. That was the talk where more than the basics were covered.

In high school I didn’t know personally know anyone who had had sex. Outside of marriage only bad girls did was what I was taught. We did hear rumors about girls, and they  were tagged with bad names like town pump. We whispered about them. We didn’t hang around with them. Nobody wanted a bad name.

Keep in mind that girls thought differently than boys. We didn’t see a triumph. We saw a bit of disgrace.

It was college and the 60’s which gave my generation a whole new perspective on sex. I’m guessing the nuns probably gave the same lecture but I’m thinking there were smirks. Besides, what in the heck did nuns know?

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12 Comments on ““good girls go to heaven and bad girls go everywhere””

  1. olof1 Says:

    Foggy and frosty all day here, I was rather annoyed that I had to work a day like that 🙂 No wind what so ever but that will change tomorrow when a low pressure passes by.

    We learned it all about sex already in second grade, they showed a film that didn’t miss a thing of how it worked 🙂 My sister had seen the same film five years earlier and she always laugh when she remember what I said when I came home: There was kat in the film 🙂 🙂

    Alicia Wikander is now close to sáinthood here, she is the first Swede since 1975 (Ingrid Bergman) who have won an Oscar for acting. I think Ingmar Bergman (no relation to Ingrid) won one for best film though, Fanny and Alexander, later than that though. They even changed the morning routine on tv and skipoped what they usually show and only talked about Alicia all morning 🙂

    Have a great day!
    Christer.

    • katry Says:

      Christer,
      I will send you some of my wind. It makes the day so much colder than off Cape. Boston was so warm it set a new record for the day. We were just so cold all day.

      I doubt any of us would have understood it when we were seven. We were probably one of the last of the naive generations.

      I really liked Ingmar Bergman films. I’ve seen The Seventh Seal, Wild Strawberries, Fanny and Alexander, Through a Glass Darkly and so many more.

      I really loved her yellow dress. You don’t see yellow often particularly one so pale and lovely. I didn’t see that movie. Sweden and Hungary (first Oscar) have reasons to cheer.

  2. Hedley Says:

    I watched the Oscars last night, and I am an expert. I was outraged that Inside Out was selected in the category of Animated Feature Film over the vastly superior Shaun The Sheep Movie.

    If I am honest my expertise sits in the category that reflects the movies I have seen with the Prince. We both loved Shaun the Sheep and quickly cast aside the eventual winner.

    When my friends were in China we used to see all the nominated grown up movies as bootleg copies would appear, often marked as being only for Oscar viewing. Today I couldn’t tell you a Big Short from a Room. I know that a bear did Leo and he got an award – maybe if he could draw a little better he would have got one for Titanic.

    The Prince and I have April 15th circled, as we will be heading out to see the new version of The Jungle Book in 3d. We watched the original cartoon many times over and are looking forward to this future Oscar winner

    • katry Says:

      My Dear Hedley,
      I enjoyed the Oscars. They were better than they have been in a long time. I didn’t see any of the animated films.

      If you and the Prince are indignant Shaun didn’t win, I will respect your opinion.

      My friend years ago also had access to movies for Oscar Viewing only, and I’d watch whatever he got. Now I have to go to the movies or pay on TV.

      I saw a trailer for the Jungle Book movie. I haven’t seen the original cartoon, but I did see the film made in the 40’s.

  3. Richard Says:

    Bright ’n sunny again today … in the mid-to-high 60s … where did winter go? Winter, we hardly knew ye … come back, Little Winter!

    That password trick is actually relatively easy. Start with a phrase you like or use often. Keep it between 8 and 12 characters. Transpose it into HUMAN-readable characters like the song titles are now. Memorize it, and … VIOLA!, Bob’s your uncle.

    Did a bit of the ol’ ‘Out & About’ today … had to visit Meximart to pick up more shallots ’n things. Got a bag of fried shallots for my daughter, and she’ll get ’em next time we have lunch together. They also have what they refer to as ‘Passion Fruit’ on display, and even tho’ my memory is clouded by the Fog of Time now, those things look an awful lot like what we called ‘maypops’ when we picked ‘em from the vine on camping trips in the country as kids. Swung by a Big Lots and a Dollar General on the off chance that a ‘restricted assortment’ store would have the Bacon Salt I’m trying to find, but noooo … so I went to Burger King and picked up 2 orders of their Chicken Nuggets. Yeah, I know, chickens don’t have ‘nuggets’ and they’re made of ‘pieces ’n parts,’ but they’re still good. Even better, they’re cheap – picked up 20 for $3.28. I’m so easy …

    No Oscars in my house. Don’t need ‘em and they’re a massive timesuck. I can waste my time better in Photoshop.

    That thing about The Priest As Pedophile is nothing new. When I was an unwilling (say ‘mandatory’) attendee at Sunday Mass during childhood, we knew then that some of the Good Fathers had a propensity to interpret the Biblical phrase as ‘Diddle the little children that come unto me’ … we used to bet on which unlucky altar boy parading up the aisle with The Padre was gonna have an ‘after-hours’ session with him once Mass was concluded. The worst part of the whole enterprise was that the parish with the offending priest would just pack him up and transfer him to an unsuspecting new parish with no explanation as to why he was being sent there. Holy Mutha the Church would deny it, but y’ know the receiving parish knew exactly what they were getting.

    I learnt about sex the raunchy way: In the barbershop and at the Penny Arcade. The barbershop always had the latest and greatest issues of ‘Police Gazette’ and other sops to the libido. The Penny Arcade had two Avenues to Education: One was the ‘penny dreadfuls,’ the crank-wind viewers with flip cards of women ‘gittin’ jiggy wit’ it’ down to their undies; the second form was off-limits to us because of our age. The Arcade had a curtained-off area that was always dark. We knew they had ‘moving pictures’ back there, tho’, ‘cuz one of the guys who worked the counter told us they did – and that’s why we couldn’t go in. If we tried to sneak peeks thru the curtain, we’d get an earful of various and sundry noises, including many deep moaning sounds. We mighta been kids, but
    we weren’t stupid kids.

    My Junior High School had a ‘Home for Wayward Women’ across the street from it. The name was ‘St Elizabeth’s Home for Unwed Mothers,’ and that was a pretty blatant admission for the ‘50s. When I was elevated to High School, we learnt pretty quickly that the girls who got knocked up were sent to St Elizabeth’s with the cover story that they were ‘spending time with Aunt Sophie in Pensacola.’
    Mm-hmm. When they returned to classes, they never looked as carefree as before their ‘vacation.’

    You’re right about the ’60s and that ‘new perspective’ … it was great for the guys, and I’m still not sure how it turned out for all those ‘liberated’ little girls – but hell, we have Gloria Steinem and Betty Friedan, don’t we? That kinda tells the whole story.

    • katry Says:

      Richard,
      Boston was close to being hot at 60˚. The wind here was so cold I stayed on the deck to fill the feeders then hurried into the house. I have changed this one often as I keep forgetting the number I use. I know the word but not the number.

      I stayed in today and did inside chores: paying bills, watering plants, changing the litter box and changing the sheets on my bed. Tomorrow I’ll vote then I have a few things to do.

      I am a fan of movies. I don’t generally see then at the movies but on TV. I’m sure the big screen is better, but I like a bathroom close by and my popcorn maker.

      The Spotlight team found that in the records of the diocese all the parishes and their priests were listed. They checked every year and found that priests designated on sick leave were the church’s way of dealing with the pedophiles. Originally they found 13 then were told that there were more: they cam up with 73 after doing the research in those books.

      We all did share information so we all could have a complete understanding of sex. We did well.

      I didn’t know anyone who got pregnant until my roommate did my senior year in college. She managed to graduate as she didn’t have the baby until late June.

      I think it was also liberating for women as well.

  4. Birgit Says:

    Sex lesson in school was boring, 7th or 8th grade in the 1970s, they didn’t tell us anything we didn’t already know.

    • katry Says:

      Birgit,
      We didn’t know too much and a lot of it was misinformation passed from kid to kid. We were quite naive back then.

  5. Bob Says:

    Sex education was a let down. The teachers never told us how the sperm got into the woman, somehow it just miraculously appeared there. Sex education was mostly a lesson in plumbing.

    A mother catches her prepubescent son in the bathroom playing with himself. She exclaims, “Johnny don’t do that or you will go blind”. He replies, “Can I do it until at least I need glasses”. Sex education class never addressed that aspect of sex. I already wore glasses so I could always get a stronger prescription. 🙂 In High School I assumed all the athletes and cool guys were having sex but the rest of us were only just degrading our eyesight.

    I also enjoyed the Oscars and Chris Roc did a great job hosting. I haven’t seen the movie Spotlight, but I know the ending. 🙂 I did see ‘The Martian’, ‘Bridge of Spies’ and ‘Steve Jobs’. The last two were terriffic. I’m sure Leo did an Oscar winning performance but I can pass on seeing the movie.

    • katry Says:

      Bob,
      I totally agree. Plumbing was the main topic. I suppose they expected you to guess at the rest.

      We were still pretty naive in high school. Nobody really discussed sex, and I didn’t know any girl who had had sex. There were no whispering groups when we were outside for our 15 minutes after lunch.

      I though it the best Oscar presentation in a long time. I’m going to pass on Revenant as well. It just looked too violent. I want to see Bridge of Spies but am so so about Steve Jobs. I really liked the two, Spotlight and The Martian, I saw.

  6. Jay Bird Says:

    I think you would appreciate Revenant, though maybe not like it. Yes, it is “dark”, but DiCapprio was amazing. You would like Bridge of Spies! Spotlight reminded me of All the President’s Men, a superb movie. Deserving winner. Mark Ruffalo is cool but way too intense! Saiorse (?) Ronan was very good in Brooklyn (a “date movie”). Surprisingly, I saw many of the nominated films and actors. Must have been a good winter for flicks! I missed The Martian, but it’s on Netflix already.

    My early1960’s Catholic education had one hour (total) on sex-ed in 8th grade, taught (gender-separated) by a celibate priest and nun. Talk about the blind leading the blind!! The Catholic girls I knew had virtually zero knowledge, sadly, even of their own bodies. That’s simply wrong! Thankfully, things changed shortly thereafter.

    • katry Says:

      Jay,
      I do want to see Bridge of Spies, but I’ll pass on Revenant. The violence in the clips was enough.

      I like Mark Ruffalo but for some reason he kept either one or both hands in his pockets. I don’t know why but it drove me crazy. I like The Martian a lot.

      It was a priest for us, and it was pure anatomy and telling us about the surprise of puberty. We all had zero knowledge. I think we were the last naive generation.


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